Tag Archives: Fun

Humour-Things that you never thought about…

Here are a few things to think about that you probably have never
thought about;
Can you cry under water?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to “put your two cents in”â¦. but it’s only a “penny
for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny going to?

Once you’re in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up
like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you
naked anyway.

Why is “bra” singular and “panties” plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t
point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re
both dogs!

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but
call it a hemorrhoid when it’s in your butt?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at
you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the
window?

Do you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address in the first place?

When I was young we used to go “skinny dipping,” now I just
“chunkydunk.”

If money doesn’t grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?

How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for
Miss America?

If a 911 operator has a heart attack, whom does he/she call?

Wouldn’t it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply
press Ctrl Alt Delete’ and start all over?

If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started
with something called labor!

31 days of lists challenge, day 3

Day 3: Activities I’d do if I was brave

1 Skydive
2 Go on tv and talk about my mental illness namely the did
3 Bungee jump
4 Do an interview with someone about my struggles with my weight
5 Stand in the same room as a wasp and not run for my life when it buzzed around me

Planning a great weekend!

This is gonna be a great weekend. I have plans!
Tonight I’m going to see the musical singing in the rain with mom and my aunt. We booked it a few weeks ago. I love musicals and used to be in a stage school for many years, so seeing this show will really bring me a lot of happy memories from my childhood in the montfort college of performing arts.
Tomorrow my cousin is having her birthday party. It was her birthday earlier this week. We’re going to a local restaurant for dinner and then probably will have a few drinks after that. Except I dont think I’m going to drink any alcohol because it will mess with my weight loss programme. But I will still enjoy myself I’m sure.
This afternoon moms going to put a color in my hair. I was going to get it done in the salon but its so expensive and a box color is just as good in my opinion. This morning I’m going to the beauticians to get my lip and eyebrows waxed. I’m trying out a new beauticians that my sister recommended to me.
What are your plans for the weekend?

Sunday Random Q and A

1. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
I’m not sure. I guess sometimes I would. If I had a choice I’d like to be a writer, and I still might be one some day.
2. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
Not usually. I dont have phone anxiety thankfully. I like talking on the phone. I’m good at it too lol.
3. What would constitute a perfect day for you?
A day where everything in my life went right, where I got to see the people who are important to me, where the sun shone bright and no clouds were in the sky
4. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
I sing to myself all the time. I love singing. Cant really rmemember when I last sang to someone else.
5. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
The mind. I dont care about looks but to lose your mind due to old age or dementia or another affliction would be terrible. I’d rather be dead than do that.
6. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
Sadly I think it will be either by suicide, or illness, since I’ve attempted suicide on numerous occasions its still a part of my life at times, I dont think it ever goes away.
7. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

For my guide dog, my health, my family, my therapist and psychiatrist

8. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

I’d love it if I could make my dad not drink alcohol to excess, and if I was able to stop his anger outbursts, I would not want my mental illnesses, or abuse history.

9. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

I’d like the ability to cook for myself, and I’d also like the ability to drive.

10. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

How I was going to die, if I’d ever recover, if my sister was going to have any more kids

11. What does friendship mean to you?

to me friendship is where you treat someone with respect, love them, accept them for who they are and where they’re at, treat them with integrity and honesty

12. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

I have a partner whom I love dearly. I’m a very affectionate person, I freely give and recieve hugs and kisses to family and friends

13. When did you last laugh?

Last night while I was on skype with my friend Sarah

14. Are you a morning person or a night owl?

I’m definitely a night owl 😛 my sleep patterns are weird!

15. Seen anything weird lately?

No. Unfortunately my life is boring lol.