I am beyond stressed. Just came out of a meeting with the manager of the college I am in and the rehabilitation officer. I was not expecting this today. I did get to raise all of the issues I am having though which is good I guess. It was a pretty positive meeting overall. I told him that I was not happy that I wasn’t able to access all of my notes, and I also told him that maybe I should get a reader. At first he said maybe we could record the classes, but then he decided that wouldn’t be a great option because of data protection and copyright and other issues of possibly the student in the class not wanting to be recorded as there is a lot of class discussion. So then I said would he get me a laptop. He eventually said yes he could but then he tried to tell me it would take 3 months. He gave me the option of exiting the course and coming back in 3 months when all issues have been resolved. I quickly said no that I didn’t want to do that. I would prefer to just continue with how things are now. So then he said he could probably get me a second hand laptop. He’s also going to talk to the training standards officer about the exams and assessment process and see if we can get alternative questions set for the ones I am unable to do, and see if I can have a reader. Usually they aren’t allowed to see the exam papers or assessment instructions before they take place but he said he’d make a case for me and hopefully they’ll agree and let them have them. I told him that everything else was going fine, and he said I was doing a good job on advocating for myself. I did mention my level of frustration which is why he gave me the option of exiting for a few months until everything is sorted out. I guess it will show when I do my first exam in two weeks. We’ll see then how well I am coping I guess. Until then, I’ll just work with what I have and how things are. Its all I can do.
So, as if this mornings stress wasn’t enough, my stress just took on a whole new level. I just came out of a meeting with the training standards officer about accessibility stuff surrounding assignments, exams etc. So it went like this. She asked me if I knew anything about word, and I was like sure I do, so then I asked the instructors why they decided to start me on spreadsheets as the first module, instead of word, when I know absolutely nothing about spreadsheets. I told them it would be so much easier if I was allowed to start with word, because I know quite a bit about it and if they need help with jaws and stuff I can help them with it as they don’t know a lot about jaws. You see, half the group of us are doing word as the first module, and the other half are doing spreadsheets. So when I actually said to them that I’d prefer to do word instead of spreadsheets they agreed to that. Thank god! So next Monday I will start word. There will be two exams in word, and one assignment which is also graded. They were trying today to figure out the best way for me to access the exams and instructions for the assignment. I asked if I can have a reader, the officer said possibly, but first they are going to scan in the material and see if it can be read with jaws. I know jaws reads pdf files but I tried to tell her it wont read images, and tables are also pretty hard to navigate. She said they’d try to scan the instructions and exam paper in, and then if it doesn’t work, if jaws doesn’t read it they will look at an alternative, but first they have to prove that they’ve tried the other way. Pretty stupid if you ask me but that’s how it is. I’m just glad to be starting with a module that I am relatively familiar with. I was so worried about starting into something I know zilch about. I’m sure that we’ll get the accessibility stuff sorted in time. We have a couple of weeks before the exams and before I have to start the assignment so that’s good. It gives us time to iron out the problems.
I didn’t sleep good last night. It was partly because I slept earlier in the evening. When I came home from college yesterday my home help came and helped me cook, then I just crashed. So my pattern was all out of sync. I ended up waking up in the middle of the night and just got up then because I couldn’t get back to sleep again.
While I was up I caught up on email and read some blogs. I also fixed up my ipad, I had to reset it back to factory settings and update the IOS software. I am selling my ipad because I rarely use it, I always seem to use my I phone instead. My sisters boyfriend said he wants to buy it, so I’m selling it to him. I need money to buy a new laptop so I am selling a couple items, my ipad, kindle fire, and a netbook which I have but don’t like. Hopefully they will make enough money so that I can buy my new laptop and office and my jaws screen reading software as well.
Todays been a pretty quiet day at college. We had one class this morning, and someone came to talk to us about the schools new facebook page, other than that I’ve been just messing around online and stuff. I cant wait until next Monday when we will finally start the modules and really get into the work fully.
Tomorrow I see dr Barry. I’m looking forward to that. I’m sure we’ll talk about lots of stuff.
Day 15: Something you have done right
Participated fully in my healing and recovery. Been a good friend. Listened well in class. Bonded well with Nitro.
Omg I am so not a morning person since I started college. I keep saying I’ll get a routine going, and go to bed at a reasonable time. Then I dont. I really do need to try doing that! I didnt get to bed last night till after 2 AM. Then I slept fitfully and eventually got up at 7 AM. Saw to Nitro, and then ate breakfast. I swear though my eyes are hangout out of my head! I booked my taxi and will leave at 9:45 AM. It is gonna be such a busy day because after college I have therapy. I’ll come home in between for about an hour. But therapys at six, so I wont get home till after 8 eek. I think therapys going to be hard tonight. I wonder if we’ll do more EMDR. I like that but its tough going. Dealing with the trauma stuff is really hard.