Death of a family member

So I’ve posted on our blog a few times, that our grandad was very ill. It was kidney failure he had.
He died last Sunday. At 1:25 in the afternoon. It was a really peaceful death, but the lead up to it was awfully hard on him. The week before he died he was extremely sick. The toxins from his kidneys went into his brain. He had severe agitation, confusion, etc. It was really awful to watch him go through that.
On Friday morning he got a morphine pump on…and that was the beginning of the end. He slipped into a coma then and only woke up for brief periods, where his eyes would flicker open and he make little sounds. We were all there when he passed, all of his six kids, and 10 grandkids. He died smiling.
The funeral was yesterday. It was so very sad. But it was also so beautiful. He got cremated. That was his wish. The service was beautiful, with lots of singing, readings, my aunt spoke about him, and we did the prayers of the faithful. I almost fell apart as I read them but somehow I held it together.
Its been a really emotional few days. To be honest I am glad its all over. It has really taken an emotional toll on us. I know my grandad is happy now and he isnt suffering any longer. Its a relief for him really. He had such a fear of dying, however he fought such a courageous and brave battle. He inspires me to be positive or try to be positive about life and keep fighting and battling on even when I dont want to.

14 thoughts on “Death of a family member”

  1. My heart goes out to all of you. When someone who has been there throughout your entire life is gone, it is especially hard.

    I am glad he died smiling, with all of his family there. I believe his smile may have been his way of telling you that he was going to a wonderful place, that death is nothing to fear, after all.

      1. Years ago when my neighbor, Pat, had terminal cancer, she was in terrible pain and terrified of dying. I stayed with her throughout the nights during the last two weeks of her life, holding her hand and watching her breathe so she could sleep. Pat was afraid to sleep for fear that she would not wake up, so I told her I would watch her breathe while she slept and I would shake her awake if she stopped breathing. So then she was able to sleep.

        Most of the time, my watchful presence was enough to comfort her fear, but one night she could not calm down. It was wearing me out. As I held her, I silently prayed: “Lord, I have no more strength. I cannot be strong for Pat any longer. Please, help her!”

        In the instant after I said that silent prayer, Pat exclaimed: “Oh, praise the Lord! I see Jesus!” She calmed down immediately and remained calm until her death two days later. On the morning when she died, I had waited until her mother and another friend arrived at the hospital to stay with Pat, and then I went home to tend my children while their father went to work. Soon after I left the hospital, Pat died. Her mother told me that Pat was smiling when she left this world.

        Last December I was very sick with two bacterial infections which were probably caused by a freak encounter with toxic black mold. A few days after I accidentally inhaled a lungful of the mold, I was so sick that I did not expect to live to see this new year. During my sickest time, I felt God’s presence very near. Although I have always been terrified of dying, I had no fear at all when I felt so close to death.

        Thanks to the miracle of antibiotics, I survived. My biggest regret, when I thought I was dying, was not having written my memoir. So I am doing that now…. although it is so hard to write, I think dying would have been easier!

  2. This is so hard, and sad for you and your family. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my grandpa a year ago, and if still hurts, but i have moments where i can think of him and not cry. I believe my grandpa is in a place where he isnt hurting anymore, and yours is too. Be kind to you. This is so hard. Sending hugs, if you want them. Xx

    1. thanks alice. I believe he’s in a better place too. I’m sorry you lost your grandpa too. Its hard. Hugs back for you too. Xo

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